Palace Shadows: The Diary of a Female Eunuch - "The first time I killed a man, it was to keep my 'eunuch's' life."

Snow fell in the palace. White frost coated the blue bricks like burial shrouds for the dead.

I had no time to dwell on that. The Crown Prince’s letter still burned against my chest, while Shuntian Office agents scoured the palace for their prey.

I knew they weren’t hunting a "spy."

They were helping the Crown Prince purge useless pawns.

And I—I had simply stood in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Under cover of night, I changed my route—from the Imperial Kitchen to the Laundry Bureau, slipping out under the pretense of fetching water.

A young eunuch stopped me. "Who are you? Which directorate do you serve?"

My stomach dropped.

Can’t be caught. Absolutely not.

I forced a smile, pitching my voice low. "Me? I serve His Highness the Crown Prince."

"Liar!" He grabbed for my sleeve.

I didn’t think.

My elbow slammed into his gut. My hand wrenched the knife from his belt.

Then—the blade was at his throat.

He gasped. "Y-you… you’re not a eunuch?!"

My hand trembled.

The knife cut anyway.

Blood sprayed across my robes, scalding hot.

I had killed my first man.

Not for vengeance. Not for justice.

But to protect the lie I lived.

I hid the body in a water vat, scrubbed my bloodied clothes a dozen times in the well before daring to move again.

The letter was still there. My heart still beat. My life was still mine—for now.

In the chaos, I finally slipped through the eastern gardens to the Shuntian Office’s side gate.

The Vice-Minister, a cold-eyed old man, took one look at the letter and sealed it away.

"Your name?"

"An Wuyang."

He studied me, then nodded. "Go. His Highness said you’re to live—so I won’t ask how you came."

I turned to leave.

"Though… Young Master An."

I froze.

"That delicate skin of yours doesn’t look like a eunuch’s." He smiled. "Be careful. Even the Crown Prince can’t shield your kind forever."

I wasn’t taken back to the kitchens.

Instead, I was brought to the Eastern Palace’s side chamber.

The Crown Prince studied a chessboard, not bothering to glance up. "Killed someone?"

Silence.

"Good." He laughed, placing a piece like a verdict. "Now you’re truly mine."

Finally, he looked at me—the gaze of a predator toying with prey.

"An Wuyang. From today, you’re no palace servant. You’re the Eastern Palace’s shadow."

"You’ll act for me. Kill for me."

And in that moment, I understood:

I had entered the palace to escape a marriage.

But now—I’d been sold into a far greater lie.

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