In Maxim’s childhood world, everything was quieter than elsewhere. Even the wind seemed to whisper softer by his window. He rarely cried—not because he was brave, but because crying made his head ache. And everything else ached too. He was the kind of child who could fall ill from a draft, from someone’s shout, from a TV turned up too loud.
His mother always said,267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5sFwy9Sbgx
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyU3KzwtejM
“You’ve got too kind a heart, Max. It tires faster than the rest.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVadR2cju2X
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2UdHPG38R6
He didn’t understand then that she wasn’t talking about his heart, but his soul—and that it wasn’t kind, but fragile.
Six years old.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8I72aLUhpz
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrZRhq0Gk3x
A small table. Watercolors. A jar of cloudy water. A piece of bread. Maxim paints—carefully, meticulously, as if it’s something more than a picture. He paints a house. His mother. The sun. Himself—a little figure with crooked arms, but smiling.
His mother strokes his hair from behind.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5avaDTz7Gk
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfFJShTGPD8
“Pretty. That’s us?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm2VLVRRVsM
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZqzlk4UQhk
“Mm-hmm,” he hums.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡnvarvFAqV0
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSW54XqS3NB
“Why didn’t you draw your dad?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgLZxhvpuAR
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5tZ3m2Tw3O
He shrugs. “No space.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVNH6wx63Xx
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡLHCm9bpKxo
She smiles, but her eyes go sad. He notices—and feels ashamed. He wants to fix it, add his father in. But his hand won’t move.
There isn’t no space.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyLQlVb3aBh
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ8pzp6vaE8U
It’s just that next to his father, there’s always darkness.
His father comes home late. The smell of alcohol arrives before he does. Sometimes with the heavy footsteps, the door slam, the shouting. His mother shrinks then, becomes smaller, hides her smile in her palm.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5pvQuiLJXY
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoOZuMSnEGs
“Go to your room, sweetheart. I’ll come in a bit.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJATim8smeA
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtkEy2E5UXO
He obeys. Not always. Sometimes he sits by the door, listening.
At first—just voices. Then—thuds. Blows. The sound of things hitting walls. The sobs. The crash of falling objects.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡeHYChvI5DZ
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVRAEdw9GKU
Then silence.
That ringing kind that makes your ears hum. He would press his hands over them, close his eyes, whisper:267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVhz6xDec8b
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡyQL0Z36lBl
Please stop, please stop, please…
And sometimes, it actually did.
That day his mother told him that if he ever got scared, he should hide.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡj10fSRAGue
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOZVuAKiMt
“In the closet,” she said, opening the door where her dresses hung.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZ998IaKCks
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrTh29SbR9b
“What about you?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlVFiNzYG72
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ92NSx4Aeby
“I’ll be right there. I promise.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbMHkbo3xgt
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgCKb6pg8QQ
He nodded. He believed her completely.
Eight years old. Evening.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrnI3HGVMMY
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9E61e09SeU
His mother brews raspberry tea, sweet-smelling. Maxim sits at the table, swinging his legs.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNpXY5jJk0e
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡFSLoCugmIO
“You’ve got school tomorrow,” she says softly.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaM8EcDxMpn
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡb9NRITpADI
“I don’t want to go.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNBroD4L5Q8
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMso8ahRhcd
“Why not?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVd1ARjs0om
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlnPU6i1PvE
“It’s loud.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQC4SaG51g0
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzg27JmJoID
She laughs. “But there are friends there.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡz8umn0scMn
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrEm4rXDnKw
“I don’t know how to make friends.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6eAB0GlZZV
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡBOw42zUyRQ
“You’ll learn,” she says with confidence.
He smiles. He likes it when she talks like that—as if she can defeat any misfortune.
But trouble never knocks. It barges in.
A slam. The door. A bottle clattering to the floor. His mother turns, no surprise in her eyes now—only tiredness.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1TNHjH1X4z
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr3bgJVo3Rb
“Again?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ6wXBFW0jvn
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAguASeo68x
“What do you mean again?!” His father’s voice shakes the walls. “Where’s the money, Natasha?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡW48ApzAMQJ
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡDIGVuzcQtb
“We… talked about this—”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWJsfHTxUpv
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfzAjSZ61uT
“We talked? You talked!”
He staggers forward.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡh7WxS8hb63
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡmALhIF2rE0
Mother grabs Maxim’s hand, pulls him toward the closet.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX4AXxXGb6C
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ93CoQVY9FN
“Quiet. Quickly. Don’t breathe,” she whispers.
He obeys. He already knows something bad is coming.
The closet smells of soap and her perfume. Through the crack he can see a slice of the room. His father hurls the bottle at the wall.
“Stop!” she cries. Her voice cracks.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡv0J4dgXywy
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5SGyXWUSsN
He steps closer. His arm rises.
Maxim wants to run out—but can’t. His body won’t move. His insides lock up.
Then—a blow.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP8MNAfQs88
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2XOwnvfu1Z
A dull sound. The crash of glass.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ9XXPE0v0QC
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡWzSY8RFN2H
And then—silence.
That same silence he would hate for the rest of his life.
When Maxim opened his eyes, the ceiling was strange—white, with a crack in the corner. He didn’t understand where he was at first. The air was thick enough to write on with a finger. Moving felt like a dream.
The system’s voice hovered at the edge of hearing:267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHmUhJuVuR6
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuXGtNsXzey
[Subject stabilizing.]267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoCjkxPJRlr
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡta7pxzYzBT
[Mode: passive recovery.]
He blinked. His throat was dry. His lips salty—probably from tears.
On the chair sat Lapin. No ears now. Gray sweatpants and a hoodie. Calm eyes, almost curious.
“You lost consciousness,” Lapin said. “For about twenty minutes.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡziJJChLSJw
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNtkH5QFuB5
“And the neighbors?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvBmZi1z23t
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMJr5PSdioQ
“Gone. I convinced them you were sick.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡEkT07Ymq4t
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡQQw0mkss92
Maxim gave a weak smirk. “Not exactly a lie.”
Lapin tilted his head slightly. “The system warned me. Your psyche is unstable.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡP8SOwvc2rk
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡGmti86jTUl
“Yeah. Thanks for the update, doctor.”
He tried to stand, but his legs shook. Lapin leaned forward to help, but Maxim waved him off.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwMsR6fGYAu
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡy1JHpdRGJb
“Don’t touch me.”
Silence. The air froze.
“You had a dream,” Lapin said. “About the closet.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡJ7wWbb5ZC0
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHjGvjeloga
Maxim turned sharply. “Stay out of that.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ7SlbN4CfpX
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡr8j4bRNWec
“I’m not in it,” Lapin replied calmly. “The signal was too strong.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡgQAhTtE4RE
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzfIVuveUv7
“It wasn’t a signal,” Maxim rasped. “It was a memory.”
He sat down again, buried his face in his hands. The quiet pressed in on him.
“When you were eight,” Lapin said gently, “you met what humans call… fear.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡn52me5qymV
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡCs6mDFugIf
Maxim gave a bitter laugh. “No kidding. Thanks, Captain Obvious.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHNkSKn4fDN
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX0KVgzaiQk
“You joke,” Lapin said, “because that’s how you survive.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡlN0dJUMeqH
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡM8uk8Slmsw
“It’s the only thing left,” Maxim murmured.
He closed his eyes. The scene replayed again. His mother. The closet. The glass.
Tears slipped down his face before he even felt them.
“She died,” he whispered.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSvEDPDnCQ5
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡYDn5PF6wT1
“I know,” Lapin said softly. “The system showed me.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡwUrBgkx6uF
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡZRkahJauAs
“Of course it did. It knows everything, doesn’t it?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpOwh5pQ91c
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvkmXBG2dOH
“Almost everything. But not feelings. They can only be observed.”
Maxim let out a hollow laugh. “I don’t feel anymore.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡAFgGG5SMt8
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm7K9yYgYsD
“That’s not true.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ4K8E7hhuMx
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkopcEjBcQp
“It is. I’m just… empty.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡSOeZCzGoN4
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtp8nZDQrQo
“Then where do the tears come from?”
He didn’t answer. His hands still trembled—but not from fear. Just because his body didn’t know what else to do.
Night. He never slept.
Lapin sat by the window, silent. His reflection in the glass looked pale, moonlike. Maxim lay on the bed, staring at the ceiling, thinking that once he’d wanted to be an artist. To paint people who smiled. But after that day, he never painted again.
Colors annoyed him. Especially red.
“You know,” he said quietly, eyes still closed. “My mom always protected me. Even when she couldn’t.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvD5uz0Ux7B
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcbqCy0QHDM
“And you wanted to protect her.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ63vQSLuimJ
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ3rlU1lZMZY
“I did.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡACwS0JVxOr
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXag1H85qJL
“Why couldn’t you?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡm4skr0G9H8
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡtM0DfUEvT2
“I was a child.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ2QTwbMhFkF
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ911uou259J
“But you still blame yourself.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbwL1HOxTm5
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡVG5cRDA2aK
“Of course. Who else is there to blame?”
Lapin came closer, sat at the edge of the bed.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡNQGinDj6bm
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡXCl3929HoT
“You’re not guilty,” he said. “Weakness isn’t a sin.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡqOj77NC5cG
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡPaVUTFkv8B
“For the system it is,” Maxim muttered.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuYKibvh6WC
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ60bd5CYzY4
“Not for me.”
He turned to look at him.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡV6ow2FxvHB
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡt2WNpqMiDc
“Why do you even protect me?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡkaEoLWlBEN
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡxf5wo8UWeU
“That’s what I was made for.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ1ymdKszwz8
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡHKiqKxL0xP
“Can you lie?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡMVHfT7oIPh
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡpc88ou9Nw2
“No reason to.”
He said it so simply that Maxim suddenly believed him.
Morning was gray. Still. The air felt lighter, but inside—still empty.
The system was silent, except for a faint pulse deep within:267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡzKiLRn0HoN
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRzNS71UOp2
[Subject stabilized.]267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡE8RcSts5X4
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡrAwwATa8LC
[Emotional response restored: 12%.]
He smiled without joy.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡs2VZfgO5eQ
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡamRwQekOvo
“Twelve percent. Progress.”
Lapin poured tea. “You’re still human,” he said. “You can feel.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB1ySVuMTeC
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡoXgeRs3sGQ
“What if I don’t want to?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbxYBe0fGi3
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡbJA1jgMs1E
“Then that will be your feeling.”
Maxim rubbed his eyes. “You know, Lapin…”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡRjxFGQGjA1
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡuvHdWiXlES
“Mm?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡaeE5cU6JNj
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡznbuBIK4uL
“If I ever break again—hide me in the closet.”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡcvd1mMzWPx
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡX3omQl5BTw
“Like when you were eight?”267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ0KvmwJjBAB
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡB4B93Wh8VS
“Yeah. Just… don’t promise you’ll stay.”
Lapin watched him for a long time.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡfM4l9lb5aO
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ46Arc9I34A
“I won’t promise,” he said at last. “I’ll just be there.”
Light spilled across the floor in pale stripes. Maxim sat on the bed, sipping tea, thinking that for the first time in a long while—he wasn’t thinking about fear. Just quiet.
As if that little boy in the closet was still somewhere near.267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡvaVDEc3HEg
267Please respect copyright.ＰＥＮＡＮＡ5JG0Kbh0Bh
And maybe, this time—he wasn’t alone.
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and then Add to home screen.